Another Milestone! Today I am 50 Days into foundation! ahem... not that I've been counting 
Am so happy to report that last night's weigh-in was....BLOODY FANTASTIC 
I lost another 4 lbs, bringing total weight loss to 
1 stone 8lbs
Scary BMI now 28.1
I know 4 pounds is not a huge amount, but for me it was such a relief to see a significant result after 3 small losses in a row.
We have lost another two group members 
S did say that at this halfway point many people just cannot face the thought of spending the same amount of time all over again in abstinence. Personally, I feel happy to continue - even safe where I am 
and actually the thought of eating 'real food' kind of scares me right now.
In group (what is left of it) we looked at thought records and 'Hot' thoughts'.
Initially this sounded like more psycho-babble terminology, but S actually got us thinking about situations that are familiar to us as individuals and to break down our thoughts and feelings into percentages - the highest percent being the hot thought. We then looked at the actual evidence for that thought. This made me chuckle because there is actually very little evidence ...if any atall for much of the negativity and paranoia that trundles through my pea-brain on a daily basis 
The key is to take a step back and try to change the hot thought into a more realistic one. I think that is a skill that requires much practice (like years) ~ but I am going to jot some thoughts down over this next week and see if I can give it a go.
S did say something that really caught my attention.
She said that we would never dream of saying the things that we say to ourselves every day to another human being ~ and if we did say them, someone would probably hit/arrest/sack us or lock us away 
That is so true.
Why in God's name do I continuously berate myself for simply...being?
Everything from appearance,weight,dress sense,my home,children, performance at work,driving,sex.... 
This has to stop! it's no bloody wonder I have been so depressed...and so fat 
If someone else was as nasty to me as I have been to myself.....I would have to find some comfort somewhere.....oh yes ...that'll be the FOOD then 
Hmmm...methinks the penny may be beginning to drop
I guess there may something in this therapy game after all
It is my birthday this Friday 
Traditionally it is the BEST excuse for a boozathon dressed up as dinner with friends.
Not so this year!
Trouble is....am racking my pea-brain to try and come up with something just as fun but that doesn't involve eating or drinking 
Any ideas will be very gratefully recieved 
Next Tuesday S is going to measure us again and I am actually looking forward to that, as last time we were all really pleased ~ much more with the tape measure than with the scales 
I now have two fellow Lighter-lifers keeping in touch via blog (not from my group)
They are both at the beginning of their journeys and so far doing BRILLIANTLY
I am so delighted to have their support here in blogland ~ support and encouragement are priceless gifts.
Thank you ladies 
"Having never received any words of encouragement myself, I'm not sure how they're supposed to sound. But here goes: I believe in you."
